“Excuses are the tools with which persons with no purpose in view build for themselves great monuments of nothing”
That was a great quote by Steven Grayhm, it could not have been more well articulated.
We all give excuses at some points in our lives either to escape from responsibility or to make ourselves feel better about a failure; we try to console ourselves with excuses when we don’t give our best and when the inevitable happens……failure. From the foregoing, it is evident that our failures stem from the series of excuses we give in order not to hold ourselves accountable and reach for the peak.
How many times have we pointed accusing fingers at others? how many times have we tried to comfort ourselves for doing wrong by pointing to others who had done similar things in the past? how many times have we compared ourselves to others who had failed more than us just to feel better? All these are borne from the fact that, we don’t have anything substantial to live for, we lack purpose and are not driven at all, because no man or woman of purpose will give in to excuses.
Excuses can negatively impact our lives and turn us to losers, quitters, and average people.
consider the following and change your thought process:
1. Excuses are for losers: winners do not give excuses, they don’t pay attention to failure with the intention to embrace and feel good about it, but they learn from their mistakes and try to achieve the same things in better ways, their mentality is that they have learned one way not to do it. In sharp contrast, losers are quick to jump into self-defense and give several reasons why they failed and take comfort in the fact that they tried. But unknown to these persons, trying alone is not enough, we must achieve.
To attain success in anything, a series of trials and errors and failures are required because it is only through these that we learn to do things better and by extension grow. Honestly speaking no responsible person would give in to excuses because it devalues who you are and make others take you for granted. If you said you are going to do something, then do whatever it takes to get it done, those excellent reasons why you were unable to do them are mere excuses, period.
2. Only losers quit: I used this word “quit” here but honestly I don’t like using it. Quitting is the easiest thing to do in today’s world, of course that is not so difficult to understand why: the world and life is moving at a very fast pace now that people who cannot match up quickly resort to excuses to feel comfortable. I have been tempted several times to just quit and take the easy route, life can be so hard but we don’t have to just quit like that; we are powerful beyond measure and we are designed to overcome every obstacle and rise to inspire change, but it comes at a prize, we must be determined because nothing can stop a man or a woman of determination. We have to guard our minds with all that we have got, whenever the thought of quitting comes to mind, we have to remind ourselves that the only thing that stands between our success or dream is that inner lying voice that tells us that we cannot achieve it, we must train our minds to recognize this voice and debunk it and only pay attention to the voice of truth that still resides within us. Ultimately, we are the architect of our lives, choose to construct yours the way you want and achieve your potential.
3. Excuses lead to laziness: no matter how vigorous and/or energetic you are, once you start giving in to excuses, you become lazy and your attitude will become that of apathy towards any and everything. The effects of excuses affect every area of our lives, if you gave an excuse why you hit the snooze bottom when the alarm went off today that resulted to your lateness to that appointment or work, that would translate into you giving several reasons why you didn’t go to the gym, read that book, visited that friend, took yourself out, showed some grace to yourself and others etc. ultimately excuses just give us the bad energy not to get anything accomplished.
When I think about why we give excuses, I think most times it is because of our insecurities and lack of self esteem. Apart from trying to make ourselves feel better, we also want to shield our insecurities under the ugly face of excuses.
Some ways we can get rid of excuses
1. know yourself: take time and examine what your strengths and weaknesses are, no one understands you better than yourself. If one of your weaknesses is not keeping promises then try not to promise at all but if you do, make sure you keep them.
2. Honesty: be honest and realistic about your goals and commitments, don’t set goals based on your friends’ and parent’s way of life, don’t say because Tim goes to the gym 4 times a week so I will do the same; in fact I have a confession to make, about a month ago, I asked my friend Shaun what some of his week’s goals were…in his list he included going to the gym 4 times and I thought to myself, I can do this as well, so I included it in my week’s goal. Honestly, I didn’t even go to the gym once that entire week. Why? Because it was not mine, I copied it. I gave several excuses why I should do other things instead.
3. Be resolved: know what you want and what it will take to achieve it and be resolved to go for it no matter what. This is a very crucial step because obstacles will always come and try to stop you but your resolve will be the thing that keeps you going.
4. Delight in trying: don’t be afraid to try new things and don’t be afraid to fail because we will always fail but the good thing about trying is that we get experiences and from these we can learn and grow and do things better.
5. Be responsible: take ownership of your life and make the best choices to drive it to the destination you want. When you know that this is your life and no one else will do for you what you can do for yourself, stepping up to the plate to act without excuses becomes your way of life.